Have you ever said something you wish you hadn’t?
https://anchor.fm/s/5ecf4168/podcast/rssFind out some of our dark secrets and dangerous pitfalls we had to overcome to survive and thrive.
Watch the presentation on YouTube then subscribe for more great content every week.Your mind presents only the potentially disastrous consequences of your pursuing an opportunity. Don’t let that stop you. Go for it. When you have a partner helping you, it’s much easier to go for it.
Quote from Toby during the livestream
We have been business partners for about 10 years.
We could be very general about what you should never tell your business partner, but we’ll incorporate what we’ve experienced in our partnership.
Specific instances from our lives will bring up stories and we find stories resonate better than generalities.
However, after coming up with five or six things that happened in our partnership over the past 10 years, these statements provide a good overview of what not to say.
Toby Younis and Shelley Carney stop to take a selfie while recording for New Mexico Day TripsThere are a lot of things we have to try when we’re putting together a business. We have to try things to see if they’re going to work or not.
If you’re never going to take a chance on something new or different, then you will probably fizzle out before becoming successful.
It is the nature of humanity that if you cause someone to think less of themselves by making a comparison to someone else, you’re going to cause psychological conflict.
You will tap into their feelings of not being good enough, and that can be very hurtful.
The words should and shouldn’t instill shame.
It’s often used for something that a person cannot change.
For instance, “you should have taken care of that a month ago.”
It is too late now, so move forward.
Don’t should on other people, or yourself either.
This story is about the establishment of an obstacle by the individual.
Sometimes you need to help your partner overcome the obstacle by helping them rewrite this story.
You cannot overcome the obstacle for them, though.
They have to overcome it themselves with additional information and a sense of thoughtfulness about the topic.
So if you hear that phrase, it doesn’t mean you can’t break through.
If you are the one saying “I can’t,” then remember you can change that story as soon as you stop fighting to keep your limitations.
Don’t tell your secret desires to your partner unless you want your business partner to help you make them happen.
If I were to say, “I’ve always wanted to write a book.”
My partner says, “Great! Let’s write a book!”
I might say “I can’t. I shouldn’t have told you that.”
If a secret desire is something you really want to make happen, then tell people about it. Otherwise, keep it to yourself.
These are some projects that we have done together since 2012, starting with New Mexico Media Makers, an interview talk show about the local media industry in Albuquerque.
These are some projects we’ve completed over the last 10 years together.
If you scroll through the Messages and Methods YouTube videos, you’ll find samples of our work from each of these categories.
I’ll share some things we’ve said over the past 10 years that I remember very well because they signaled a change in our relationship and business.
Streaming New Mexico Interview with Lawrence Rael, Democratic candidate for Governor of New Mexico in the 2014 election. Team Stream features Toby Younis, Sean Wells, (Lawrence Rael,) Shelley Carney, Jason Younis, and Sue and Shaun Scott.Shelley Carney: When we started our business, Streaming New Mexico, in 2014, one of our first contracts was for livestreaming an interview with Lawrence Rael. He was running as the democratic candidate for Governor of New Mexico and wanted to express his ideas and share his platform with viewers.
As a member of the Streaming New Mexico team, Toby wanted me to do the interview.
I learned about interviewing from Toby.
We produced New Mexico Media Makers, where I got to see smart people doing good interviews.
When we went to Film and Media Day at the Capitol, I was interviewing people one after the other.
Toby said, “You do the interview, and be like Rachel Maddow.”
Rachel Maddow is one of Toby’s favorite journalists. She’s very good at digging out information about a topic and presenting it clearly to a widely diverse audience. So he wanted me to be like her in a very professional and journalistic manner.
But I’m not Rachel Maddow.
It offended me he would suggest that I needed to be like somebody else.
We had a long talk about it a few days later and agreed to never again tell each other how to behave or to be like somebody else.
Scratching Kat- 2015 Athena Award-winning short screenplay.
Toby said to me one day, I want to write a screenplay, but I can’t do it.
He showed me all the books he read about screenwriting.
He was trying to understand the formatting and how to write a screenplay, but he kept hesitating, waiting to be perfect before starting.
I had taken a class on screenwriting and practiced writing short scripts. I knew it was easier to do than he was making it out to be. Especially for somebody as smart and creative as he is.
So I said, we can do this. It’s simple. You talk and I’ll type.
I sat down at his computer and opened up Celtx, a cloud-based screenwriting app.
I said, okay, what is the setting?
I typed what he said.
Then we got into the dialog, and I typed that.
After a few minutes, he got up and looked at the screen in amazement because he understood he could write a screenplay if he tried. It was that easy.
Together, we wrote our first short screenplay. It was about 10 pages long. Each page of a screenplay equals approximately one minute of video.
We called it Scratching Kat, and the story came from Toby’s experience and his imagination.
I helped him flesh it out and get it into the right format.
We submitted it to the New Mexico Women in Film local chapter in Santa Fe. They were hosting a competition for short screenplays, 10 pages or fewer, where a woman is the main protagonist.
We won an Athena Award for Scratching Kat.
Critter Chase – 48-Hour Film Project, July 2016
Once we realized we could write screenplays together, we started writing more.
Toby wanted to make a 48-hour film as a team for the 48-Hour Film Project.
From 2013 to 2015, I was an associate producer in Albuquerque for the 48-Hour Film Project, so I knew the work that went into making one.
I had never made one myself and didn’t intend to because of the stress it puts on the people involved.
Also, the films almost never lived up to the team’s expectations. Even when you shoot videos regularly, you still encounter unforeseen problems and delays.
Toby really wanted to make one, and I was no longer an associate producer, so it was possible.
But was it a good idea?
I finally said, all right. Let’s do it.
You get to draw two slips of paper to choose your genre. Our slips said “Road Trip” and “Period Piece.” We chose “Road Trip” because we didn’t have an art department to put together a set and props for a period piece.
I knew we were going to spend a July day in the Albuquerque desert, in the car, and it was going to be a long, hot, stressful day.
But, we had a really great team. We worked really hard together, and we put out a sweet little film called Critter Chase.
Toby Younis: The team was relatively small compared to the other teams.
They show the finished films at the KiMo Theater in downtown Albuquerque, and you meet the other teams. Some of those teams had 20 people. We did it with about six. So it made it a little harder.
Friday night you get the genre and the required elements, including a character, occupation, and line of dialog that you must include in every film for that competition.
Then you have until Sunday evening at seven o’clock to deliver the finished product to the 48-Hour Film Project producers.
Shelley Carney: After we chose our genre, we went back to Toby’s apartment and wrote the screenplay. It had to be seven pages long because there was a seven-minute limit on the films, not including the credits.
We had to come up with scenes, characters and sets that we already had on hand so we could make it all happen in a day.
In the end, we made it to the top 10 out of about 40 teams but didn’t win any prizes.
Toby always thought he would go back and edit the film properly, but we just left it the way it was, mistakes included.
If you want to see Critter Chase, you can find it on our channel. Keep in mind, we made the whole film in 48 hours, including writing the script, shooting, editing, and rendering.
A Gypsy’s Kiss YouTube channel 2017-2020
Oops! There’s another “should.”
But Toby listened to my suggestion.
Then he asked me “Why?”
I told him I had been meditating, and it came to me he should get back into the treasure hunt. It would be good for him to enjoy his hobby again.
We had been trying to build content marketing for our Videotero business doing video production and commercials for small businesses.
The results were disappointing for Toby because we could only livestream to Facebook and we weren’t getting many views.
So I suggested we build a YouTube channel about the treasure hunt.
We started creating weekly videos on our channel, A Gypsy’s Kiss, talking about the Forrest Fenn treasure hunt.
Toby Younis: I had been looking for the treasure since 2012 and blogging about it. I had a blog called A Gypsy’s Kiss, and that’s where all my thoughts about the treasure hunt were going.
I didn’t think about making videos.
It had been three years since I had posted audio-only interview videos on my YouTube channel about the treasure hunt. They were simply interviews over the phone that I was doing with various treasure hunters.
Forrest Fenn, the hider of the treasure, helped me get more motivated toward live streaming.
He asked if I would make a video for one of his events when he gave away a handmade bronze jar filled with artifacts to raise money for Raynelle Jacobson, a treasure hunter suffering from cancer.
I agreed, and then he called back a day later and asked, could we livestream it?
Toby Younis livestreams an event at The Collected Works Bookstore in Santa Fe, NMI didn’t know how because at that point my only experience with live streaming was while I was in Washington, DC. I technically directed a couple of events for broadcast news that required a truckload of equipment and 10 or 12 people.
So I started researching it and that’s when I found out that live-streaming equipment had been reduced to a box about the size of a sandwich that cost about $500.
I let him know it was possible, and I asked him, will you pay for it?
He said, yes, so I got the box and we livestreamed that event in January 2014.
The plan for A Gypsy’s Kiss was to make videos, edit, and upload them.
We started livestreaming when we hit a thousand subscribers and 4,000 hours of watch time in October 2017.
We used the Mevo, which was a camera for livestreaming. It was unpredictable.
So we started investigating other options and eventually we got to where we were using OBS on a desktop computer.
We got pretty good at the whole livestreaming thing and building studios. That’s what led us to our AGK Media Studio business.
A Gypsy’s Kiss: A Treasure Hunt Adventure by Toby Younis & Shelley Carney Published Aug. 2020
Shelley Carney: Toby told several good stories about his life, and people would always tell him those stories would make a great book.
You should write a book.
He’d laugh it off and say, I don’t have the patience to sit down and write a book.
When somebody found the treasure in June 2020, I forced him to find the patience.
Together, we decided to write a book to launch our own treasure hunt. I thought we might as well start with a story he had told me a dozen times.
To hide the treasure proxy, we had to drive from New Mexico to Louisiana.
Toby and I sat in the front of his little red truck and drove to Louisiana. I had a laptop computer on my lap and I was typing, and Toby was telling the story as he was driving us through Texas.
Just like when we wrote a screenplay together that first time.
He couldn’t get bored and wander away. We committed to sitting together for several days as we drove hundreds of miles across New Mexico, Texas, and Louisiana.
We drove a similar route to the one he took when he was 15. That is the story we were writing about. As we drove, memories came back to him.
We wrote the book, A Gypsy’s Kiss: a Treasure Hunt Adventure.
Toby Younis: This is an event that had taken place 55 years ago. We have a tendency to embellish stories to make them good.
In my mind, it got to where I was not sure if something in the story had really happened or if I made it up.
Another thing I discovered is that I could take events in my life that were unrelated and incorporate them into the story.
I spent my summers at the top of mountains in fire watch stations. I met Bucky McGee. He was a ranger, and he was famous for having been struck by lightning seven times, including two times when he was riding horses. The horses were killed, but he wasn’t.
I wanted to bring him into the book.
It was a true story in the sense that the people existed, and I had that experience, but it didn’t happen as part of this adventure.
The way we approached it was conversational. I could drive and talk and Shelley would write. Then, later on, she’d come back and fix it.
The other advantage we had was Kevin was sitting in the back and he was my story fact-checker.
He would say, Nope, you can’t leave New Orleans on a train at that time on that day.
I remember they put me on a train to send me back to Santa Fe, but I didn’t know what time or day it was. He would correct it.
By the time we got back from our road trip, we had 22,000 words, which is three-quarters of the way through the book.
Then we added and started doing rewrites and I think we ended up with close to 40,000 words for the book.
It was a good experience that led to us writing two other books, Women in Podcasting and Livecast Life.
But they were nonfiction and easier to write.
Shelley Carney: Toby tells me “I’m not a coach.”
When you tell your partner you’re not something, but they see it in you, then who’s right?
Is it just a story you’re telling yourself?
Is it semantics?
He tells me what he did as a consultant, and I’ll say that’s the same thing a coach does.
He has a hard time believing that he’s a coach because I have a certification as a life coach, and he doesn’t.
It doesn’t matter. I know what a coach does and I see him doing it.
Toby Younis and his granddaughter Mila McGarry live stream together on YouTubeWhen his granddaughter, Mila, was visiting in October, he brought her into the studio and taught her how to livestream to YouTube. She was very excited about it and now she wants to start her own YouTube channel.
He interviewed her and drew out stories about her travels.
The whole time he did that, he was acting as a livestream coach.
Obviously, he is a coach.
“I’m not a coach,” is just a story or semantics.
Toby Younis: It’s easier for me, because I made a living at it, to call myself a consultant.
The only coaching experience I have had is when I coached girls’ soccer for 17 years. That’s how I see coaching.
I don’t see coaching as people advising you on how to direct or improve your life.
Describing myself as a consultant is something comfortable for me because that’s what I’ve done for a significant part of my career.
At AGK Media Studio, we offer.
Tell your business partner it’s time to create great content for your marketing!
Livecast Lifestyle Implementation Program: program.agkmedia.studio
How to Create, Publish and Distribute Content Consistently: course.agkmedia.studio
Here are courses we offer that can help you tell your business partner, it’s time to create great content for marketing and get started on it.
We offer the Livecast Lifestyle Implementation Program, which takes you from having no idea how to do marketing to having a content and email marketing strategy and framework in place and running like clockwork.
If you want to build your content marketing strategy into a complete client attraction system, go to program.agkmedia.studio.
If you’re already creating content, but you want to do it more consistently, our course, How to Create, Publish, and Distribute Content Consistently is the one for you. Get it at course.agkmedia.studio.
You’ll learn the content consistency framework and schedule that we use to produce and distribute four shows a week.
If you want to get started creating your own show, schedule a video chat with us at consulting.agkmedia.studio.
We’d love to talk things over with you and hear about your vision.
In almost every instance, it is our natural response to being presented with an opportunity to, A, not see it as an opportunity, and B, immediately implement some obstacles to achieving that opportunity.
I can’t write a book.
I can’t write a screenplay.
I can’t create a course.
It is in our nature as human beings to do that because we want to protect ourselves.
We don’t want to be embarrassed because we didn’t accomplish or complete it.
People who say I grab every opportunity are probably exaggerating. Nobody grabs an opportunity without first saying to themselves, what am I going to get out of it?
Your mind right away says that’s not really an opportunity.
You’re going to be embarrassed.
You don’t dress well enough to be an influencer.
You’re too old to be an influencer.
If you sat back for just a moment and looked at the opportunity, you’d realize it is likely something that you wanted to do your entire life.
By achieving that, you will have accomplished something that you may not have accomplished before and now have the confidence to do it again.
I said I couldn’t write a book.
Now my name is on three of them, in a relatively short time.
When you are considering an opportunity, that probably includes some change in your life. The first thing your mind is going to do automatically is try to protect you.
You can’t do this.
You’ve failed at other things. You’ll just fail at this.
You’re not pretty enough. You’re not smart enough.
That’s how the mind works.
The first step to taking advantage of an opportunity is overcoming your own obstacles in your head.
I recommend having a partner to help you imagine what would happen if you wrote a book or built a course and get excited about it together.
Overcome the obstacles that you’re creating for yourself and pursue that opportunity.
Is there a chance you will not achieve what you expected?
Yes.
But the benefit is that you’re going to learn more about pursuing opportunities.
You’re going to learn more about yourself and your strengths and build confidence.
Your mind presents only the potentially disastrous consequences of your pursuing an opportunity.
Don’t let that stop you.
Go for it.
When you have a partner helping you, it’s much easier to go for it.
It doesn’t have to be a business partnership. Any relationship can make life better.
Bring what you have to the table.
If you need a partner, we’re here to help you with your content marketing and building a YouTube channel, podcast, and blog.
We can provide all the support you need to get your ideas out into the world.
Join Shelley and Toby for a tactical meeting of the minds to discuss the most effective and efficient content marketing strategies for encore entrepreneurs.
Are you struggling to create and convert leads? Are you overwhelmed when you think about how you can stand out in the online market?
This show is for you, the encore entrepreneurs, coaches, consultants, thought leaders, and speakers – how do you gain visibility and credibility online so your ideal clients hear your message and reach out to connect with you? Expert livestreamers, Shelley Carney and Toby Younis of AGK Media Studio provide tips, tools, and strategies for creative, fun, and effective content marketing through weekly livestreaming, podcasting and blogging.
Visit with us live every Thursday to ask questions and solve problems related to creating consistent quality content to promote your brand and business.
Find more information and our content archive at https://messagesandmethods.com/
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